♥ Unsure&Confused ♥

To me Priya is enough and its like I don't need anyone around me anymore.

But that's not how life works.

 

Hahahas.

Ok nvm.

Well basically isn't it quite obvious that I actually am giving you the attention?

I think it is quite obvious that I'm more concerned over you.
I'm more into you.

Its like you are dumb -.-

Sometimes I feel like laughing at myself.

Cause its like whatever I would have never imagined myself doing,

is what I am doing.

But the good part is no matter what, after having a short convo with Priya,

everything feels so much more better.

Hahahas. She is awesome & I am awesome-er.

No sama sama all ah Priya.!!

Canfusions mele canfusions.

Haiyo haiyo.

Ippovey kanney kattudey.

You are confused.

And you are very clear about you being confused.

And you know what you are doing but say that you don't.

You tell me that you are doing something wrong.

But you yet do it.

& which makes me conclude that you know what you are doing.

And this whole thing is making me confused.

Your clear confusion is making me confused and I am confused if I am confused cause I understand what I said yet understanding you is hard.

Oh My Kadavule.

Maana madhurai maamarakilaiyile.

I'm going to so be married to my sonthakaarans.

Hahahahahas, Thanks Iyar.

That information helps me a lot.

Lame shit [-.-]

♥ So Far ♥

Understanding you is just so hard.
You are keep changing your words.
Once you said you are committed.
And now you say you are not.

I don't know whats going on in your mind.
But I just feel like I am being used.

Sometimes I just can't help it but the feelings just comes.

I don't even know if now you are still the same.
It is my fault that I rushed into things.
I don't know how to make my wrong choices into right ones.

♥ Who am I ♥

I am not myself anymore.
Then who am I?

I have lost myself completely.
Its like I am trying to be someone else.

But I am not.
What happened to me?
Maybe I need some time alone to know myself.

No one knows me better than myself.
And now myself have lost it.
I have lost it all.

I just wish a hole appears infront of me.
I can jump in and disappear forever.

I am losing everything I have.
There is no one but myself to help me.

I need someone.
I want to cry out loud.
But I can't cry out with anyone but myself.

Arghh I hate feeling...

` this is end tuhh my sad lyff!

` eu noe wad! Im just over eu seriously ! I thouqt thru nt only fr an hr ! But fr weeks and months ! Seriously i just feel tt eu dun worth me! Eu didn appreciate th luv tt i had on eu ! Eu didn bother weneva i said those special words tuhh eu- iloveyu! And all eu cared was abt eu and tts all! Each and every day eu fouqht wif me! Thats wads eu knw ! And i thouqht everythinq would chanqe as days passed! But it didnt! I waited soo lonq fr eu ! And i just could nt frqet th past ! Now i feel th pain nw! Bt nw ! I dun think this is all worth it! I have forqotten eu and ive moved on ! Now is my tym tuhh be peaceful and happi! Don think u cn spoil my happiness! Eu are out of myy lyff nw and forever ! qdbyezz!

` A story of a qals lyff

` she loved quy and he loved her too ! But he was a divorcee ! And he had a kid too ! Th qal knew this and this was th main reason fr her tuhh fall in love wif hym ! She wanted tuh be wif hym fr th rest of her lyff and he also promised her tt he would be her lyff partner ! She had so much of hopes and dreams abt her future and was just waitinq fr everythinq ! And she was crazy over hym ! And they were very lovinq ! She was so kind-hearted tuhh even take care of hyss kid as her own ! And then there was anther lyff qrowinq in her ! Even after knowinq tiz ! He still promised her tt he will be wif her til th end ! She knew very well tt wad she was doinq was allwronq ! But she was still darinq enuqh tuh face th consequences ! And then , as days went by ! Th little lyff in her was also qrowinq ! As it was happeninq ! Day by day , her hopes and dreams increased and it was mainly towards th child ! She was ready tuh face anythinq tt comes her way ! Unfortunately, th quy started havinq some probs ! And he tot tt if th nther child qq tuh come tuhh this world he will have even more prob ! So , all he could tell th qal was ! ABORTION ! Th cruel thinq ! And wen th qal heard this ! Her heart shattered into pieces ! She refused and she said tt she would brinq up th child as a sinqle parent ! But th quy refused ! And he brain washed her ! And towards her th quy was everythinq fr her ! She didnt want hym and hys kid tuhh suffer ! And she did listen tuh hym ! But all was a lie ! Once she did th cruel thinq ! He just left her alone ! All she could do was sit down and cry and reqret ! Bt it was too late ! And she tried tuhh frqet everythinq ! Bt she couldnt ! And finally she moved on wif her lyff ! But th memories are still within her and hauntinq her !
Hope this will nt happen tuhh any qals and all i cn say is ! Its very easy tuh have unconditional love on someone ! But wn they hurt eu is very hard tuhh take th pain ! And such quys shud never exist in tiz world !

` qet it ryte into eur skull

` Eu think wad! Am i a bloody toy fr eu! Seriously askinq! Wen i loved eu so much! Leavinq everybody! Eu didnt appreciate! Nw wen i movinq on, frqettinq every sinqle shit! Eu sayinq tt eu want me and stuff! Pls luhhz! Im aint a small kid! Tuhh melt fr all those sweet talks! Or are eu lykk testinq my love! Look! I know my love was true! tts enuqh! I dunn nidd a certificate frm eu tuhh say tt my love was true and all those! And if eu wanna test my love and then accept, i don think tts true love! Becoz, in th beqinninq edi eu dun haff trust! Then how are eu qonna trust even a small thinq fr lyff lonq! There is only one solution fr all this! Eu fyn eur own way! I will fynn my own way! Omq! Eu may also think! I was soo crazy over eu and nw im sayinq lykk tt!How lonq eu want me tuhh be hurt and hurt myself and my loved ones! I think i deserve them than eu in my lyff luhh! I just cant take th words eu told me! Wenever i called eu! Eu will say tt i dun haff anyone tuhh tok tuhh tts why i coled! Eu know hw hurtinq was tt! Hmm whr eu qonna feel all this! All eu knw was to hurt me! Why was i tt bad to eu!! Towards my knowinq! I seriously loved eu more than anyone in my lyff! I had soo much of love and respect on eu! And eu know tt very well! When i think abt it now also, im just cryinq! Why eu hurt me so much luh! Why did eu leave me! Eu seriously know tt i cnt frqet eu and th tymes! And eu know tt i loved eu soo much! Then why luhhs! All this drama! Isnt it too late tuh look baq ! Haiz! Ive nth to say anymore! Just qet th lyff tt eu want! Im no more in eur lyff! Eu can be free and do whatever eu want! But wenever anythinqq happens in eur lyf, i quarantee eu tt! Eu will haff th thinkinq of me bcoz my lurve was true !
* broken heart*

` My fcuked up lyff[!]

` i feel so restless[!] I just feel like qivinq up in everythinq[!] I just sooo hate my lyff[!] Why only must i suffer like tt[!] Why must i see all this nonsense[!] A sister betrayinq me[!] What th hell did i do tuh her[!] My fault fr her as my sister[!] This is what i qet for treatinq her as my sister[!] I am nt qq tuhh trust anybody anymore in my lyff[!] I haff had enuqh in my lyff[!] I just don think tt i deserve all this in my lyff[!] I haff been too qood tuh people[!] And all i qet in return is this shit[!] So im qq tuhh chanqe[!] qq tuh be selfish[!] I am qq tuhh show th bytch and bastard tt i also cn live a lyff[!] No one can rule my lyf[!] Im livinq my lyff lyk a leqend[!] And i will live lykk a leqend[!]

where is my future without eu!

` unnodu vazhatha vazhlvaena vazhlvu, en ul nenjam solkindrathe! Poovodu pesatha katraena katru, oru poonjolai ketkindrathae! Manil yen yen yen neeyum vanthai! Enthan penmai poo pookavaey! Nan pirakum munaey ada nee piranthathaen! Nan pirakum pothu, nee unthan kaiyil ennai entha thano!

Unodu vazhatha vazhlvaena vazhlvu en ul neju solkindrathae!

Meliya aann maqanai penuku pidikathu! Murada unnai rasithaen! Thotathum vizhunthuvidum adavam pidikathu! qarvam athaai mathaithaen! Moodi kuthum unthan marbu en panji methaiyo! Un pizhlaikum mutham athu enna vithaiyo! Unnai polae aan illaiyae! Neeyum ponal nan illaiyae! Niradipathalae nee nazhuvavilaiyai! Aam namakul udal illai!

Unodu vazhatha vazhlvaena vazhlvu en ul nenju solkindrathae! Poovodu pesatha katraena katru! oru poonjolai ketkindrathae!

Nee oru thee yendral, nan kulir kaivaen anbae theeya iru! Nee oru mulaindral, nan athil roja! Anbae mulaiyiru!

Nee veerama kallan uloorum solluthu! Nee irama parai en ullam solluthu! Unnai motham nesikiraen unthan moochil swasikiraen! Nee vasikum kudisai en mada mazhiqai! Kathalodu betham illai!

Unodu vazhatha vazhlvaena vazhlvu en ul nenju solkindrathae! Poovodu pesatha katraena katru oru poonjolai ketkindrathe! Mannil yen yen yen neeyum vanthai! Enthan penmai poo pookavae!

Nan pirakum munaey ada nee pirathathaen! Nan pirakum pothu! Nee unthan kaiyil ennai entha thano! ♥

♥ i love eu so dam much ♥

tuhh myy pr0pertyy[!]

` bby thanks fr th w0nderful love tt eu haf sh0wed me and y0uh are still sh0winq it tuh me! Every sinqle dayy y0uh seem tuh be s0methinq new! ii just l0ve y0uh f0r wh0 y0uh are bbysyq! We haff shared s0 manyy thinqs between us! I t0t ii would nt be able tuhh m0ve on fr0m myy past! But eu pr0ofed me wr0nq! Eu were th reas0n f0r me tuhh m0ve on! ii th0uqht n0 0ne w0uld c0me lykk my ex! n0! Eu sh0wed me th l0ve tt i was wantinq f0r badlyy! In th few dayys we haf faced s0 manyy pr0bs but still we end up beinq t0qether! And i seri0usly admire eu and m0st imp0rtantly y0ur shyyness! Hahs! But i d0ubt whther y0uh still haf tht shyynes bby! Crazzy fell0w! Th best mem0ry in 0ur lyff is tht 8hrs! n0n-st0p t0kinq! Listeninq s0nqs! I just l0ve eu bby! And iimiss eur vizhi m0odi sinqinq! Dam it! And i just cant wait tuhh see eu da bby! I just miss eur bl0ody cute v0ice bi! and all th c0nference calls! s0 fun! Th fun t0kinqs! Just l0ve th wayy eu and mummy disturb me! And seri0usly thanks tuh eu da bbyb0i im crazyy over tt s0nqs! iil0ve y0uh my darlinq! as wht eu said, no bytch or bastards can seperate us bby! And y0uh are myy pr0perty and 0nlyy mine! iil0vey0uh bbysyq! Huqqs and kisses tuh y0uh da syq[!]♥]pinky ♥

` reqretts[!] My fault[!]

` varam kidaithum nan thavara vittaen manipaaya! Anbe! ` Bby im s0rry syq! Its al myy fault! Err c0z of my anqer luhhs! Ive tried s0 manyy tymes! But cnt c0ntrol! Aiy0 and im hurtinq eu f0r nth! Im s0 s0rry bi! I d0n knw whether im fit tuhh be y0urr qal! But eu haff al th qualities tuhh be myy quy! Im realli s0rry! I d0n kn0w which farker's evil eyee! Haiz! Bby i tell eu 0nlyy 0ne thinq! n0 matter hw much we fiqht, at th end 0f dayy, im y0urs and y0ure mine! And onlyy mine! thrs nvr ever qonna be a werd break up in 0ur relati0nship! I will rather sacrifice myy lyff fr this relati0nship! I d0n ever wanna l0ose eu bby! I l0ve eu da myy bbyb0i! Im s0rry fr everythinq! h0pe eu have f0rqived me bby! Oru nal sirithaen, maru nal veruthaen! Unnai nan k0llamal k0ndru puthaithaenae[!] Manipaaya[?][!] Manipaaya[!] im really dam s0rry bby! iil0vey0uh and onlyy eu bby! Mwhaaks